Bummer World

It's not a bad place. It's not an angry place. It's not really a sad place either. It's just a "there" place. Nothing is wrong per say but nothing feels good, everything is like boxed mashed potato's. Bland, mooshy, and needing something, anything would improve Bummer World.

I wind up in this place a lot. Way more than I'd like to. Most days I can push through and I only stay there for a little bit, other days like today I can't seem to push through.

I would so rather have a bad day than a day in bummer world. It's so frustrating wanting to get up and do things, anything! but feeling like you are being physically restrained to the couch or chair or bed. Knowing you desire to be productive but just can't get to the starting line. Wanting to leave the house but you can't even go to the shower.

Then you get a phone call, someone is having a "bad" day. It's all total drama bullshit. They say things like, "she looked a me funny" "The bar wasn't fun" "I have too many social obligations" "I'm out of money until xxxxx comes and gives me more" 

All you want to do is scream "SHUT UP! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP! Do you realize how stupid your shit sounds to me? I'm living in a place where I have virtually no friends. I have no where to go even if I do get to go out without my kid. Having no money in my world is literally counting pennies to do laundry or buy the kiddo food; not waiting for xxxxx to come bail me out"  It's not about a pity party or another shitty single parent story. You just want them to finally see some REAL LIFE perspective.

Most days you can deal with your stuff, and your kids, and their school, and your school and your friends stuff. Sure it's annoying but you can take it in stride. But in Bummer World all you want to do is scream. Have someone come hold you and tell you it's okay to be the weak one today. Have them run your day because today, you just can't. You know tomorrow will probably be different but today you belong to Bummer World.